How can I help you?

Below I’ve listed some of the many feelings and issues which are present in therapy sessions, some of which might resonate with you…

Negative feelings and behaviours can be evoked in our relationship and we can sometimes be unaware of the impact this has on the other.  In couples therapy we can “mirror” each other and bear witness to these unhealthy behaviours and thus help us to own our parts and make changes to re-calibrate and re-establish a supportive and caring partnership.  

Your role in a relationship may not be clear, you might feel confused, the relationship dynamics may have changed for various reasons, leaving you unsure and in need of clarity.

Emotional needs in a partnership, where you may feel unfulfilled, overwhelmed or in conflict.

Sexual intimacy needs, intimacy, sexuality – our ways of expressing ourselves, showing our partner how we feel, meeting ours and others needs. Sexual activity in a relationship is a means of communicating with each other in a physical and emotional way and can be quite complex depending on our own experiences and views. Trust and vulnerability issues can be triggered, such as caution, mistrust and rejection.

Money and financial challenges often evoke disagreements and resentment. We can find ourselves feeling misunderstood and isolated from our partner, if we are unable to understand and negotiate our differences.

Separation and Divorce. When relationships reach this position, we can experience many strong and raw emotions. Mistrust, hurt, anxiety, fear, rejection, loss, anger and many other difficult feelings. Ironically, as a couple (particularly with children) we realise that we need to communicate more effectively even though we are moving apart. Complex feelings and loyalties trigger a need to find some sense and reconciliation within ourselves, as well as dealing with children, family and friends who are impacted. Our usual security and lifestyle may feel under threat.

Work relationships can affect our personal life, maintaining boundaries and a work/life balance can be tricky, particularly in the digital age. We can spend a high proportion of our time in relationships with work and our colleagues. These relationships are often different, as there is structure, procedures, policies and standards of behaviour to adhere to which can consequently stifle our ability to express our personal thoughts and feelings.

couple at sunsetOur sexuality, the core sense of who we truly are, on a deep inner level. It’s possible that we have experienced conflicting feelings and thoughts for a long time. Or maybe at certain points in our lives we have felt unsure about our sexuality, expressed through our behaviours and thoughts. Finding a safe, neutral space to talk and explore ourselves can provide some release and acceptance.

Loneliness can be a physical and emotional state, evoking feelings, such as self worth issues, painful emotions, sadness, resentment, anger, shame, to name a few…

Whether we have experienced a bereavement, loss of a significant relationship or feel unfulfilled in sharing an intimate relationship. Therapy sessions allow us to feel heard, give us the chance to share and to enable an internal process to find ways of managing our expectations and desires.

Repeating behavioural patterns in relationships, can occur when we are “stuck” in a particular dynamic with another person. Whether it presents as anger, violence, or repeating cyclical disagreements – these experiences are destructive, exhausting and unhelpful. Why do we find ourselves caught up in this relationship dynamic? Therapy provides couples with the space to try to uncover the complex layers which have compounded and supported such negative interactions.

Trust issues. Working through the reasons why we find ourselves mistrusting our partner or being untrustworthy, can again be complex and we need to find space to focus on what are the underlying experiences and behaviours which have lead us to feel this way. Most of us require a level of trust in a relationship, a solid base from where we can feel safe and able to express ourselves and share. Chronic disappointments/let downs, specific events which have triggered mistrust, e.g. affairs, can have a detrimental effect on the foundations of a relationship. Finding time to be honest and open with each other is a starting point. There are often unexpressed needs which are not being met which motivate us to connect outside of our committed partnership.

Difference. The ultimate question in a relationship, do opposites attract? Why have we chosen consciously (and very often unconsciously) our partner who is so different to us? Why do we now feel annoyed and disillusioned with this difference? Can we negotiate and share?

Whether you are attending as an individual or a couple, exploring your relationship experiences within your own personal context can help you to move towards gaining insight and relief.

“Your vision will become clear only when you look into your own heart.

Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside awakes.”

Carl Gustav Jung, Swiss psychoanalyst

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